Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Going Great Lengths to Ruin My Reputation

I’ll just come right out with it, I’ve got herpes of the nose. Nose herpes. We’re talking ½” pussing boils poking out of each nostril. And I don’t care what you think, if I don’t tell someone, I’ll burst.

Okay, I do care, and it is not a herpe. It’s also not ½” or pussing, but it is a painful, crusty sore on the very tip of my inner nose. And I feel like I’ll die if I’m forced to host this infection for one more day.

Breathing out of my nose is not an option. Air traveling through my shriveled up nostril causes incessant twitching of the facial muscles. Flaring the nostrils is suicide. I’ve never felt such pain.

WebMD said I need to stop picking my nose. What an insult! I don’t pick my nose! And I don’t fart! WebMD’s really pushing it, that’s strike number two...


Sean said...


I've never heard of a herpe before. But I've always pronounced herpes as if it were spelled herps. And no one likes bumps. Especially not things that go bump in the night.

Anonymous said...

Oh Leila,
I just new you would have an answer to the growth (apparently now diagnosed as a herpe)on the tip of my nose..
I suppose it could just be a pimple, but highly unlikely. ;)
I read your blog daily and LOVE it.
Thanks for making me laugh, and feel more "normal".. If there is such a thing.

Anonymous said...

Please excuse my typo in the previous post...
I meant to type "I just knew you would have an answer"
Dang laptops..

Leila V. said...

Just be thankful you’ve never seen a picture of nose herpes. Try googling that one day.

Glad I could be of assistance. ;) Seems like us hypos are on the same wavelength, contracting ailments at the same time. It also sounds like your afflicted with the lovely OCD touch, i.e. typo = death. Nice to know I’m not alone. Don’t be a stranger!