Monday, February 19, 2007

Meet The Beast: Episode 1—The Blatant Menace

In case I haven’t mentioned it, my mother is a complete psychopath. She’s The Queen of Manipulation. The Beast, as I lovingly refer to her. The world revolves around her and for her.

While I’m not trying to duck responsibility for my “issues,” the origin of my mental illness leads back to her. Here’s a little peak into our relationship and her manipulative ways.

Disclaimer: While reading these emails, you will begin to wonder if I was raised by a prostitute, in a cardboard box under the bridge. Let me address this now: that is NOT the case. I have no idea how this woman has survived this long…

Leila it's one thing to hold a grudge at me but your brother did nothing to you, he called you, you could have called him back not sure why you are doing this to him.

Sorry if this upsets you but your and Adult and your brother is just a kid he looks up to you, he was deeply hurt you couldn't make time to call him. I really don't know what to think.

Just let me know if you will be coming down for Christmas or not so I don't have to get Tonys hopes up.

Tony has a birthday December 5 he will be 15.

This is an email I received after missing a call from my brother. I talk to him regularly, and to put it plainly, he’s very disinterested in speaking with me, (just like any other fifteen year old would be). Every phone call is a conversation with her, through him. The conversations consist of him regurgitating questions and answers that she yells from the background.

Below is a lovely little note I found in my inbox, after sending my brother an email inviting him to stay at my house, without her:

Leila your just like Mike (evil stepfather). Poor you...... Don't fuck with your brother he got your e-mail and deleted it he knows your disrespting me. If thats how you feel I won't call you have a nice life.

I get the sneaking suspicion that the email address I use to contact my brother, is really an account of hers. Because every email I send him, brings a response from her.

And here she is when she didn’t receive a response to her previous email…


Your brother wiill be going into the hospital for treatment now he will be at Kaiser Oakland Monday his cancer is in three places now it woukd be nicce if you called him. Or made some time to e-mail him your absents in his life is not funny anymore, Leila he cries because you don't care about him.

Tell Rey Happy Birthday

I love the “happy birthday” she throws in at the end. So sincere!

She uses my brother’s illness to manipulate everyone, not just me. It’s gotten so bad that the court took away her parental rights on the grounds that she’s a manipulative bitch. She’s only allowed to see my brother under supervision once a week, because she’s brainwashing him to hate his Dad.

Oh, and how I love it when she reminds me that my brother is “ill,” cause I just keep forgetting!

Your brother is ill I only got to see him for 45 mins today he wanted to go to the hospital he felt so bad he is having bone pain that worries me, I hope it is nothing. Or maybe you don't want to know?

You would think you would have some more comon since about family values since your brother is health compermised

BRING THE JET SKI DOWN (YOUR BROTHER) THAT HAS CANCER WHATS TO USE IT – (This is one of my favorites. This took place last summer when after storing her jet ski for eighteen months, she decided that she wanted it back that weekend. And wanted me to drive it down to her. Now, keep in mind, the trailer had no plates or registration and I was originally supposed to store it for only two months).

I feel huge amounts of guilt for not seeing my brother more. Even though I know her emails are blatant manipulation, they still work.

I’ve tried, for the past two years, to get her to fly my brother out to my house for a week. The answer is always “he’s too sick.” Ironically, he’s not too sick to fly to Disney Land, go to Hawaii, attend multiple professional basketball games, or stay with a babysitter every weekend while she frolics around the town. Nor is he too sick for her to throw him in the middle of a nasty divorce, which is why I became upset with her in the first place.

Rereading these emails makes me realize how lucky I am to have escaped with only anxiety. I could've been much, much worse off...


dave said...

Ouch. That's right up there with being told your son needs his train set more than he needs you...

Lacy said...

isn't it amazing we all manage to survive in spite of our families?

Leila V. said...

Never underestimate the power of a good train set.


It truly is amazing!

Lacy said...

my mother is insane...but hers is more subversive. I think that's the deadly one. People think she's sane, but only the insiders know the truth.

Lacy said...

my mother is insane...but hers is more subversive. I think that's the deadly one. People think she's sane, but only the insiders know the truth.

Leila V. said...

Well, my mom likes to think she's that smooth. I don't know what's worse, or more humiliating for the child...

SA D. said...

Hi Leila,

Wow, your mom sounds, well, um... lets say she sounds like she could be Mr Burns' (from The Simpsons) wife.

Best of luck with her. I feel sorry for your poor brother.


Leila V. said...

My mom would be lucky to have a guy like Mr. Burns! Now Mr. Burns on the other hand, would probably succumb to some strange "accident".

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